Story Saturday: Choose-Your-Way-Adventure Part Three

This one is rather rushed, sorry. I was at work all day and all I want to do is curl up in bed and read Percy Jackson. If I can be bothered I may do do illistrations tomorrow, but it is another full day of work and I have a lot of assignments to do. Anyways; enjoy!

Penguins glanced between the two hallways indecisively. It was as if a large group of people were telling her which way to go and they all had their own opinions. To the right was a creepy corridor full of boxes that may contain treasure while to the left was something that growled. Maybe a bunny! Penguins thought hopefully.

“Come on magic bubbles” Penguins said to the bubbles of light floating around her. “This way.” She turned to the left.

The mysterious silver flicker that had caught Laura’s attention from across the room turned out to be a not so impressive mirror. “Huh.” Laura thought out loud, looking at her refection in the mirror, “This as was waste of time.”

“Vhat are you doink down here?” the thick eastern European accent scared Laura so much she jumped three feet into the air before spinning around. An eerie, eerie looking Goth stood only centimetres behind her.

“Jesus! I didn’t see you ther…” Laura’s voice trailed off. “I didn’t see you…” she said puzzled and looked back in the mirror, then back at him. “You don’t have a reflection.” She stated.

“Zat is correct.” The eerie, eerie Goth replied.

“Huh.” Laura said.

Faster than you can say Ich liebe Rammstein, Till Hammerette was out of the deserted lair and riding her Motorrad toward the Chairman. She knew she should feel guilty about leaving Laura and Penguins behind but they had probably already gone and gotten themselves killed so it didn’t really matter anymore.

Till’s decoding of the Chairman’s poor German, had told her that his base was on the Mysterious Island of Mystery. The island was small and there wasn’t much there that could act as a lair for the Chairman. This led her to two possibilities; either he was hiding out at Pirate Cove, or his base was somewhere inside in the Spooky Forest. Till sped up. She had to be quick to catch the ferry to the Mysterious Island of Mystery.

“So you’ve found my lair” a voice spoke from down the corridor. Penguins couldn’t believe her ears. She’d found the Chairman’s lair, just like that? “Come, face your doom.” The voice continued.

“Alright.” Penguins nodded and stepped towards the voice. Her magic light bubbles lit the way and illuminated a dog blocking her path. “Wait a minute…” frowned with a mix of suspicion and confusion. “I didn’t know the Chairman was a dog…”

“I’m not the Chairman!” the dog replied.

“Sweet merciful crap! A Talking dog!” Penguins yelped. “Oh my God! Can I keep you?”

The dog was taken aback. “What? No! I’m a fearsome guardian. I’m the terrifying Maddog!”

“Aww, you’re so cute.” Penguins cooed. “I’m going to call you Madpup!”

“Maddog! It’s Maddog!” Madpup sighed and shook his head. “Whatever.” He said. “If you want to pass you’re going to have to fight me.”

Laura sat down beside the mirror across from the Eerie, Eerie Goth and he handed her a butterscotch lolly. She unwrapped it and popped the sweet into her mouth. “So what’s your name?” Laura asked him. “And what are you doing down here?”

“My name is O’Malley.” The Eerie, Eerie Goth replied. “I like ze dark so ze Chairman let me live down here. But he never visits. I get lonely, you know?” O’Malley shook his head. “And now he’s gone and left me. Didn’t even ask me if I vanted to come.”

“You poor thing!” Laura was appalled. “You should give that piece of work a piece of your mind.”

Time to “Choose Your Way”!

Does Penguins

a) Fight Madpup

b) Try and play with him

Does Laura

a) Ask O’Malley (the Eerie, Eerie Goth) where the Chairman went

b) Try and talk the Eerie, Eerie Goth into going with her to find the Chairman so he can give him a “piece of his mind”.

Does Till Hammerette

a) Go to the Pirate Cove

b) Go to the Spooky Forest

Remember:

Everyone can vote on what each character will do but the person who the character is BASED ON will have their vote counted for two.

Tell me your choice in the comments.

Featured in this story are Laura, Till Hammerette, the Chairman, O'Malley and Maddog (although without his permission! Oops!)

Story Saturday: Choose-Your-Way-Adventure Part Two

Laura looked at Penguins and bit her lip. “If we go back to Till Hammerette she’d just glower at us, wouldn’t she?”

Penguins nodded slowly. “You’re right. Better try our luck with the trapdoor. If we’re lucky there will be something monstrous down there waiting to tear us to shreds and we well never have to face Till again.” She lifted the door and followed the steps down inside the trapdoor with Laura following closely behind.

Meanwhile, back upstairs in the abandoned room, Till Hammerette was reading through the Chairman’s diary. “Dear diary, Zella was mean to me again today. I want to feed her to the piranhas but mum always said that you should keep good subordinates. This guy’s an idiot!” Till exclaimed, “Half of this is ripped off from Rorschach’s diary in Watchmen and the rest is him complaining about his subordinates sarcasm!”

Till flicked through the book with irritation. It was only because of stupid Penguins that she was doing this. If she was leader instead of that silly tuxedo-wearing bird-brain then she wouldn’t be flicking through this stupid book.

Till stopped flicking suddenly and turned back a few pages. She had seen something. “What is this? Some kind of code?” she muttered, thinking deeply. “Wait a minute… this isn’t a code… This is just really bad German!” She cracked down translating it. Maybe Penguins was right. Maybe there was something useful in this diary after all.

It was dark down the trap door. Laura fumbled for a light switch but stopped when she realised she couldn’t even find a wall. “Penguins! I can’t see!” Laura tried to grab for her comrade but no one was in reach, nor could she find back the ladder she had climbed down. “Penguins! Where are you!” she wailed.

Penguins had wandered off. The darkness didn’t seem to bother her. Eventually she turned to where she thought Laura was by her elbow and said matter of factly “I can’t see.” She walked on a little bit further before stopping again. “If I can’t see I won’t be able to find any clues.” She voiced her realisation out loud.

Penguins thought about this for a while. “I know!” she cried and spun around, sticking her fingers out in a V. “Super Magic Bubble Power!” she cried and blew out a cascade of bubbles, each filled with a glowing light.

“That’s better.” Penguins said, satisfied. She looked around her. She was at a T intersection in a corridor. To the right the passage had been stacked with several boxes and was strung with cobwebs, but the corridor was still manoeuvrable. To the left was the passage was empty. Laura was not at her elbow as she thought. Somewhere down the corridor to the left, something growled.

A soft, far off light lit up down a corridor, giving Laura just enough light to see the vague features around her. Far to her right was the ladder she and Penguins had come down. There seemed to be a collection of tables and shelves in the room and, a short distance to her left, there was a wall with a light switch on it.

Relieved, Laura skipped over to the light switch a flicked it, illuminating the room. “That light must have been Penguins.” She thought aloud and took a few steps towards the corridor the light had come from but an out of place flicker of silver caught her attention from the far side of the room. “I wonder what that could be?” she muttered.

Till Hammerette slammed the diary down on the table in triumph. “I know where you are, Chairman.” She grinned. “There are only two possible places you would have run.” She turned to fetch Laura and Penguins but hesitated.

Time to “Choose Your Way”!

Does Penguins

a) Go left

b) Go Right

Does Laura

a) Look for Penguins

b) Investigate the weird silvery flicker

Does Till Hammerette

a) Tell Laura and Penguins of her discovery

b) Screw Penguins and go search for The Chairman on her own

Remember:

Everyone can vote on what each character will do but the person who the character is BASED ON will have their vote counted for two.

Tell me your choice in the comments.

Featured in this story are Laura, Till Hammerette, the Chairman and Zella Kate also gets a mention in there.

Story Saturday: Choose-Your-Way-Adventure Part One

The Chairman’s Journal.

March 19th, 2011.

Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach. This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout 'Save us!' And I'll look down, and whisper 'no.' They had a choice, all of them. They could have followed in the footsteps of good men. Decent men, who believed in a day's work for a day's pay. Instead they followed the droppings of lechers and communists and didn't realize that the trail led over a precipice until it was too late. Don't tell me they didn't have a choice. Now the whole world stands on the brink, staring down into bloody hell, all those liberals and intellectuals and smooth-talkers, and all of a sudden nobody can think of anything to say.

All we can do now is break it down and start again.

Penguins threw down the diary and looked around the deserted room. Only hours before the room would have been full of activity, but now only a table, an empty bookshelf and a couple of chairs remained. “He’s always one step ahead of us.”

“We could have been here on time but you just had to stop at that bakery.” Till Hammerette snapped.

“I had to stop!” Penguins argued. “It’s not everyday you see a 24 hour bakery!”

“Don’t worry.” Super Laura smiled. “We’ll catch him next time.” Till Hammerette turned to glare at her but Penguins nodded enthusiastically.

“Look, we even have a clue” Penguins pointed to the diary. “Don’t you think it’s lucky he forgot this?”

Till Hammerette rolled her eyes, “He obviously left it behind on purpose to taunt us, Penguins.”

“Holy plot-twist, Till!” Laura exclaimed, “You really think so?”

Even so, Penguins thought that there might be something useful in the Chairman’s diary. Even if he had left it there on purpose, it was still a clue. She handed the diary to Till, “Have a look through it anyway. There might be something useful.” Till took the book but glared back grudgingly. Penguins turned to Laura, “Let’s look for clues in the next room.”

It didn’t take long for the pair to come across a trapdoor hidden beneath a rug. Penguins and Super Laura exchanged a look. “Well? Do we go down?” Penguins asked Laura.

Do they go down? Time to “Choose Your Way”!

Do Laura and Penguins

a) Go down the trapdoor

b) Go back and get Till Hammerette

Does Till Hammerette

a) Grudgingly look over the diary like Penguins told her

b) Screw Penguins and the diary and go search for The Chairman on her own

Remember:

Everyone can vote on what each character will do but the person who the character is BASED ON will have their vote counted for two.

Tell me your choice in the comments.

Depending on how many votes I get the next installment will either be tomorrow or the next day.

(Also, bonus points to whoever knows where the diary entry is from)

Irrational Fears

I know I've done a list of scary things before but these aren't just scary things, these are things I'm seriously and ridiculously scared of and irrationally paranoid about. Also, recycling old blog posts is what I do best.

1. Zombies: Did you know there is a type of virus in the Amazon that controls the minds of ants? And according to the Chairman there is a type of parasite that lives in rats but only breeds in the intestines of cats so it infects the rats brain and makes it run towards the cat instead of away? Zombies are real and its totally likely that human varieties will become possible. I have a zompocalypse plan and a back up plan (Bunnings Warehouse).
   
2. Velocoraptors: I was watching some ridiculous countdown show and it said that Jurassic Park had been "scientifically proven" to be one of the most likely Sci-Fi movies to come true, after all, we do have cloning techniques and preserved specimens of dinosaur DNA. All we need now is someone dumb enough to try cloning one. And seriously people, velocoraptors CAN OPEN DOORS! What isn't to fear?
   
3. Evil ninjas with jetpacks: Watching GI-Joe with the Chairman and he made some comment that I can't even remember now and OMG!! Suddenly Evil ninjas with jetpacks were the most terrifying thing imaginable. Imagine coming up against an evil ninja with a jetpack? You just couldn't fight that thing.
   
4. the Corpse Dancing crow from InuYasha that lives in the tree outside my window: Also known as the Shibugarasu this is a Crow demon that possesses corpses and controls them. And it lives outside my window. I swear, it looks just like it. I liked crows before I met this thing, now I freak out every time I hear one.
   
5. Jack Nicholson: How is this man not terrifying? Even when he's older he's still terrifying? Doesn't his face say "I'm going to murder you in your sleep, and there is nothing you can do about it." He was a volunteer firefighter and really did break down that door in the Shining (and he destroyed the prop door in one swing!). Now I know not even a fire door could keep an axe wielding Jack Nicholson at bey and that's the type of Jack Nicholson you most want to keep at bey (followed by the Joker and the mobster from the Departed). Despite this, he is a brilliant actor and I love his stuff (but I still almost wet myself in the Bucket List).
   
6. Wrists: They're all veiny and... um... I cannot explain, let alone justify, this fear.