On a Serious Note, I Tell You Something Personal

I feel that it is important for me to confess something personal to you. To explain to you how I am. A lot of you know that I suffer from depression, and I have since I was about thirteen or fourteen. I was at my worst in year eleven, in 2008. But I'm really good and acting normal and not letting it interfere with my life. Or with anyone else's. I'd hate that. If I interfered with someone else's life just because I felt like crap.

I used to tell myself that I was just a little sad, that it wasn't that bad and I'd get over it. It was only when reading old diaries that I realised exactly how bad I was. I am not suicidal, never have been, but I did have a councillor diagnose me with severe depression when I was in year 12 and refer me to a psychologist - who I never went to.

I believe depression is different for everyone. For me depression is a dark, soft creature. The fact that I can only describe it as a metaphor just screams writer, which in turn kind of screams depression. This creature is always sleeping in my stomach. It never goes away. Some of you are aware that I sometimes have these little "breakdowns". Often I will rant on twitter when they happen. This is when the creature wakes and claws it's way up my throat, into my lungs and out my mouth where it sits on my chest, suffocating me. I don't see my depression as a monster or a beast. It's heavy dark creature, as soft as a kitten. But it's got these long sharp teeth that gently bite into my jugular and slowly bleed me out.

This creature terrifies me.

Today the creature stirred and I could feel it clawing it's way up my throat. I'm just thankful I have so many wonderful friends who came and helped me sedate the creature. So thank you, to you all, and maybe one day you'll help take the creature away from me for good.

Answers for Mr. Tom Parker

My friend, Tom, over at Crusade Against Boredom recently wrote a blog post where he asked all the questions he would ask complete strangers if he got the chance and he asked us all to tell him our answers in a reply blog post. So here are my answers:

What kinda music do you like? Why? Did you ever like any other sort? What do you think of the indie scene? What about the mainstream stuff? Is there any music you hate? What do you think of people who get off knowing about obscure bands?

• I love punk rock and punk pop, and just punk and rock in general. I also like some metalcore and post hardcore. I used to like just about anything except rap and hip-hop, but then my cousin introduced me the Rise Against, AFI and the Alkaline Trio and I was enlightened. I first started listening to metalcore and post hardcore after my friend gave me an A Day to Remember CD and I asked him for more of his music. ADtR was a good transition from punk to hardcore, I feel. Now I love Parkway Drive and especially the Amity Affliction. I prefer indie stuff to mainstream stuff, not because I have a thing against mainstream music, some of its good, just that not much of it is to my taste. I don't search out music, I find my music by being introduced to it by others, so anyone who's into obscure bands has some respect from me, particularly if they're really good, obscure bands.

Do you watch TV? What about reading? Or do you play video games? Is the modern version of reading a novel playing video games? Or is the modern version of reading a novel reading a modern novel? Do you think people do it for the escapist element? Do you? Are you comfortable with that?

• I don't have a TV at my college, so I don't watch much TV. I do borrow TV series' from the library and then have massive marathons of the entire show. Recently did Bones and am now doing Gilmore Girls. While I am sometimes disappointed to realise I'm missing Spicks and Specks, I really don't miss TV.
• I love reading, although I'm very slow at it. It took me an entire year to read 1984 and it's one of my favourite books. Currently I have a Percy Jackson obsession and am sad that I finished the series and won't get to adventure with him again.
• I play computer games, but while I enjoy them, I'm not a fanatic. I just got Sims 3, so I'm pretty obsessed. I spent three hours designing my dream house yesterday. I still haven't furnished it. Portal is probably the greatest game ever, I'm sad not to have Portal 2 yet. Scribblenauts is a close second. I also love Counterstrike and Team Fortress. I wouldn't say games are the new novel, I feel movies are more likely to have taken that role.
• I'm definitely in it all for the escapist element, music too. Just about everything I do. I don't understand while reality is anymore worth living than a dream world. Sure, if it was as simple as travelling or succeeding, than you should live in reality, but if its magic and dragons and castles and BFG's and fairy princes, then the dream world is worth living.

Do you know your family history? Are you proud of it? Do you care at all?

• I wish I knew more of my family history. I'm heading into a career focus around history, after all. I know a lot of family stories, like my grandma's early like in Holland before WW2, but I know very little genealogy. On my mum's side everyone was illegitimate, so its hard to trace back.

Do you have a life story? Or do you think events are just happening and they aren’t connected?

• So far my life is just a bunch of crazy random events, some that are happy, some that are funny, more that are painful. Even if it doesn't fit together, it'd still be a hell of a story to tell one day.

Do you believe in a god or the supernatural? Do you believe what you’d like to be true or what you think is true? If you do, why doesn’t everyone know?

• I was brought up Catholic, by when I was eleven my mum told my brothers and I we could decide for ourselves. I'm generally agnostic. I like the idea of God, but I'm against organised religion. I believe more strongly in the BFG than in the bible. For a long time now fantasy and children's stories has been what I put my faith in.

Where’s the best place to have a date? Is a movie really a good place take a girl? Is it slutty for the girl to be the pursuer in the relationship. That is, the girl is the one who gets the guys phone number, asks him out etc..

• I think all of this depends on the girl and the guy. Movie and dinner is a good standard date, if you don't know the person that well. A good first date. It also says DATE pretty loud and clear if there was the chances of one party being unclear of the whole thing. If the two already know each other well, then the date should be crafted to suit them best. Also with a girl pursuing a guy, it depends on who the girl is and who the guy is, what they're like. I would never go as far as saying its slutty. It's chauvinistic to think that only guys can go the asking out.

A guy and a girl are on a date. The night went rather well but after they leave *wherever they were* and walk down a dark alley *for some reason* they get held up by a guy demanding their money. What should the guy in the date do? Hand over his money or fight the other guy? What is the mugger had a knife? Or a gun?

• Don't try and impress the girl, try and keep her safe. The safest option would be to hand over you things, take note of everything about the guy, when he's gone call the cops, make sure the girl gets home safely and comfort her if she's upset. If you want to be a hero, try and talk the guy into only taking your stuff, and not the girls. If she has a ring that belonged to her grandmother or something tell the guy you'd happily give him all your stuff if he doesn't take her ring. That's heroic. But still, I say safety first. Protect the girl, do what the guy says, call the cops.

When someone asks you how you are, what do you think of? What, to you, defines whether your life is going well or not? Having a boyfriend, good grades, good food, …?

• Normally when I get asked how I am, I reply with the courteous "Well, thank you. How are you?" Sometimes I'll just be over being courteous and answer how I feel. That's how someone ended up with the reply "I'm somewhere between happy and a total fucking wreck". Once, when I was in hospital and doped up on morphine I replied to "how are you feeling?" with "fucked up and numb".
• How would I define if my life is going well? My life is going well when I'm not depressed and when I'm not stressed. When I look less like a corpse and more like a normal person. A moment in which I can't stop giggling and I dance as I walk and I balance along retaining walls and sing without caring. That's when my life is going well. Strangely, when my life isn't going well, it can be kind of similar. I can't stop crying, I kick things and stomp as I walk and I scream out songs without caring.

How do you define yourself? Is it your taste in music? Is it who your friends are, what you own, what your job is, what you study, …? Is it possible to not like who you are? Do you like who you are? If you don’t, would you do anything to change it?

• Gosh, I don't know how I define myself. I hardly know who I am. I am what I am. I'm a ranter, a dreamer, a nutter, a pretender, a forgetter-of-punchlines, a hoper, a wisher, a rambler, a magic-bean-buyer, a historian, a reader, a crazy-dancer, a bad-singer, a penguin. I'm the girl who gives you my umbrella when it's raining. I don't know what I am. But these are a part of it.

So, what are your answers?

Penguins is Fair Dinkum

Zella Kate gave me the Fair Dinkum Award which is awesome and all but it's forcing me to finally write a blog post, which I suppose is a good thing, seeming I haven't written in so long, but it does mean I have to think and try to be creative during my uni break.
The Fair Dinkum award is about being a good buddy so I'm really happy that Zella would consider me a good buddy. To receive the award I have to tell you five things about myself and then pass it on to five other bloggers. Right-o then:

1. I can memories lyrics extraordinarily well, especially with my favourite songs. My dad is always commenting on it. I know every word to Jesus of Suburbia by Greenday. All 9 minutes 12 seconds of it. (and I suppose I should warn you that the link contains some mature contents)
   
2. My favourite author is Shaun Tan. He is an Australian picture book author and illustrator for young adults. People may think that having a picture book author as my favourite author isn't very English nerdy of me but check them out and you'll understand. The Red Tree and the Lost Thing are beautiful books and the Arrival, done entirely in pictures, is incredible, but my favourite book (of all time) is Tales From Outer Suburbia, a collection of beautiful and bizarre short stories. If Zella ever feels like reviewing a picture book she should look into Shaun Tan.
3. I have an obsession with T-Shirts. I've banned myself from buying anymore shirts except I keep violating that ban. Most of you know about my periodic table t-shirt by now. I also have a Green Eggs and Ham t-shirt and a One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish shirt and a Where the Wild Things Are t-shirt. Someone unfortunately linked me to ThinkGeek the other day as well and I'm likely to go on a T-shirt shopping spree any day now.
4. I'm studying a Bachelor of Cultural Heritage which has a lot of people saying "Huh?" when I tell them. Basically it's a degree about heritage preservation and museums. I'm hoping to become a museum curator after I graduate. A war museum would be my dream job. I did some work experience with a Fleet Air Arms museum run by a naval base. The close collaboration with the navy and all the war history was amazing. I could happily do that for the rest of my life.
5. Despite an absolute love for lists I can never achieve the number of things I was aiming for. For a list of 100 things I'll bunk out at around 96. For a list of five things, I can only come up with four.

Now... to give the award to five bloggers...

1. Laura
2. O'Malley
3. Lucy
4. Tom Parker
5. Au7is7icr4bbi
   

Congratulations, winners!

Thanksgiving in Australia

This is only going to be short because I have to catch a bus soon but it's been so long since I wrote anything that I thought I would tell you about my first Thanksgiving.
Like everyone should be aware, Thanksgiving is not celebrated in Australia but because of the abundance of American exchange students staying on my floor at college we decided that we would have a Thanksgiving dinner.
I can't decide if my favourite part was cooking, eating or making turkey hands.

My turkey hand, Roboturkey. He fights for turkey rights across America, trying to save the birds from being consumed on Thanksgiving day.

Everyone attending the dinner had to bring something to eat and I made Cheesecake. Hanging out in the kitchen as everyone baked, making roast veggies, some weird sweet potato thing with marshmallows (that was delicious) and even a turkey, was really fun. As they say in Questionable Content "Baking is science for hungry people" and we all know that science is pHun. (Okay, I'll stop with the science jokes because math and science puns are basically the first sine of madness).
The meal was amazing and so was dessert. We have so much food left over that we won't have to go to our horrible college dinner for a week. People loved my cheesecake (yay!) and I loved basically everything there.
After dinner we all said what we were thankful for and there was an enormous amount of tears and hugging.
I didn't stay long after that. My NaNoWriMo has been driving me insane and I was behind on my word count so I needed to get some work done. I hear everyone went out clubbing, got extremely drunk and passports were lost. Some days I am particularly glad I don't drink.
In closing, Thanksgiving was an amazing night, probably one of my favourite college experiences so far.

A Hint

"Take wrong turns. Talk to strangers. Open unmarked doors. And if you see a group of people in a field, go and find out what they're doing. Do things without always knowing how they'll turn out...
...You're curious and smart and bored, and all you see is the choice between working hard and slacking off. There are so many adventures that you miss because you're waiting to think of a plan. To find them look for tiny interesting choices. And remember that you are always making up the future as you go."

-Choices, xkcd

Macbeth’s Progress into Villainy

I wrote this essay in year 10 while studying Macbeth. My teachers reply sort of went along the lines of "...maybe for a history essay...". Enjoy.


Once upon a time there was an ancient country known as Alba. The kings of Alba were elected, from a group of clan chiefs by their fellow chiefs and churchmen. One of these kings to be elected was King Duncan. But there was a problem with King Duncan. You see, Duncan kept fighting wars to expand his territories and while Duncan was off at war his people back in Alba were starving to death. Something had to be done so the chiefs and churchmen of Alba elected the Chief of Clan Moray as king instead.
Under the new king, things in Alba were looking pretty good. The new king had united the country for the first time. He made and enforced laws. Alba had become a place where the old and the sick were protected, and where women had equal rights. Under the new king Alba was peaceful and prosperous.
Now, at this time, outside of Alba in all the other countries, kings were not elected. Kingship was inherited. This caused many members of the royal family to resort to murder and war as they tried to gain kingship. Duncan’s son, Malcolm, had fled to one of these countries where kings were not elected. In this country it was believed that the king’s son became king no matter what. It didn’t matter how bad he was for the country. So the king of this country decided to help Malcolm raise an army and conquer Alba.
But Malcolm’s army couldn’t take Alba. After a failed invasion Malcolm resorted to sending assassins to murder the king of Alba.
The king of Alba was Macbeth.

Macbeth takes place in Scotland in the early eleventh century, which, at the time, was known as Alba. In the play, though, Shakespeare makes it more relevant and people-friendly by referring to the country by its modern name, Scotland. The above story of Alba is the story of “the real Macbeth”.
According to Irish, Norwegian and Scottish historians, Macbeth was, in most aspects, a very good king. Even lady Macbeth is said to have been an exceptionally wise queen. It was really only the English historian, Raphael Holinshed that claimed Macbeth wasn’t a good king. Holinshed was from England, the country that Malcolm had fled to and the country that had assisted Malcolm’s war against Macbeth. It could be more than possible that Holinshed held bias against Macbeth and that his view was coloured in favour of Malcolm and England. Holinshed’s history, the Chronicles of Scotland, also show little understanding of ancient Scottish laws which could have affected his view of Macbeth.
Holinshed is believed to be the only source that Shakespeare used when writing his play. Shakespeare portrayed Macbeth even worse than the villain Holinshed had depicted. The main aim of Shakespeare’s plays was to entertain and impress those in power, at the time this was King James, a descendent of Banquo. Because of James’ relation, Shakespeare played up Banquo, showing him as a hero and Macbeth the villain. The addition of the witches was also for the purpose of entertainment and to impress the king. James was known to have a hatred of witches.
I didn’t matter to Shakespeare that the facts he used or his portrayal of Macbeth weren’t true because sycophancy was more important in his profession than historical accuracy.
Macbeth’s progress into villainy started with an English historian, Rafael Holinshed, who wrote the Chronicles of Scotland without a full understanding of Scottish law or governance. Holinshed let his bias influence his portrayal of Macbeth and also likely wrote his history to please those in power. Similarly, using information form Holinshed’s history, Shakespeare manipulated facts in his play to please those in charge; creating the villain Macbeth is known as today.

After Macbeth’s murder his step-son, Lulach Macgillecomgain, was elected as the king of Alba but after many years of fighting Malcolm he too was assassinated and Malcolm became king by force. From Malcolm’s time onwards Scottish kings inherited the throne rather than being elected. The laws in Alba that had given equal rights and protected the poor were abolished.
Malcolm was the first king not to be buried at the sacred island of Iona.

Recubo ut Servo Visio

My motto is recubo ut servo visio which is lie to save face in poorly translated Latin. But that is not why I was lying on Thursday so I think I should put the record straight.

1. When taking a group of year 7's for a primary school to high school support day I made a child cry by playing Parkway Drive

You guys guessed right. This one's false. It was actually my frienemy (friend-enemy) who did this. But I'm sad to say I'm not as nice as you think. Since this happened I have played Parkway Drive to little kids many times trying to replicated. Most of them just go Uh huh and raise their eyebrow at me.

2. When I was seven I scared my fish so much he knocked himself unconscious and we had to jam him between two rocks so he wouldn't float to the surface and suffocate.

You're right. This is true. I was pulling faces at the fish tank and it scared him so much he ran into a rock and knocked himself out. I've felt that I shouldn't go near animals ever since.

3. When I was in year six my friend had her Russ dog stuffed toy stolen and we staged a full scale investigation that included interrogations and dusting for prints.

False. For starters, it was my Russ dog that was stolen. I never staged a full scale investigation because when I told the teacher a girl in my class "mysteriously" found it in her school bag.

4. During this investigation 10-year-old Penguins made the cleaning lady cry.

Since the last one was false. this one obviously is too. The only thing I've ever done to a cleaning lady was clean the room for her before she arrive. She obviously noticed since there was a thank you not there the next morning.

5. I am married to my sister

Zella has been paying attention! This is obviously false (eew) but I did marry my e-sister on Facebook. Basically she sent me a sibling request and after I accepted I asked her if she wanted to find out if Facebook allowed incest. It does. Unfortunately Facebook does not take so kindly to bigamy.

6. When I was 7 I bit my tongue in half.

Things are about to get awkward for Tom Parker. This is half true. I did, in fact bite my tongue in half but I was nine, not seven. While playing a mean game of dodge ball I jumped of the slide while sticking out my tongue at the the person who was in. I hit my chin and bit my tongue in half. It hurt. There was lots of blood. I had to have it sown back together. (Feeling a little uncomfortable now, Tom?)

7. I once woke my brother up in the middle of the night for apparently singing the Pokemon theme song in my sleep. I don't even know the Pokemon theme song.

A blatant lie! I have never sung in my sleep and have never woken my brother by singing in my sleep. And I know EVERY word to the Pokemon theme song. And the PokeRAP. And the Digimon theme song. And... I need a life...

Did Zella just call me a liar?

Thank you to the amazing and incredible Zella Kate who awarded me this award:


To accept this award, I need to:

1. Thank the person who gave you the award
2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog
3. Link to the person who nominated you
4. Tell up to six outrageous lies about yourself and at least one outrageous truth, or vice-versa
5. Nominate seven "creative" writers
6. Post links to the blogs you nominate
7. Leave a comment on each blog letting them know they've won the award.

So, seven things. Some are lies. Some are true. Some are lies that are part true. You need to decide which is which.

1. When taking a group of year 7's for a primary school to high school support day I made a child cry by playing Parkway Drive
2. When I was seven I scared my fish so much he knocked himself unconscious and we had to jam him between two rocks so he wouldn't float to the surface and suffocate.
3. When I was in year six my friend had her Russ dog stuffed toy stolen and we staged a full scale investigation that included interrogations and dusting for prints.
4. During this investigation 10-year-old Penguins made the cleaning lady cry.
5. I am married to my sister.
6. When I was 7 I bit my tongue in half.
7. I once woke my brother up in the middle of the night for apparently singing the Pokemon theme song in my sleep. I don't even know the Pokemon theme song.

Alright! Tag time!

• Laura
• Lucy
• Rebel
• JessCar
• Tom Parker (that's if I'm allowed to tag someone who hosts their own blog)
• O'Malley
• Pvt Donut

Enjoy.

I look forward to seeing what you think is a lie and what's not :P

Bucket Lists!

I've been away for a bit over a week and, while I was planning of giving you a sort of summery of my trip, I am too tired to be bothered with that right now but I do want to post something. So, instead, here's something I've been meaning to post for a while.

Really, I have two bucket lists. I have my "Things to Do Before I Die" list as well as my "I've Just Been Told I Have Weeks to Live" list.

I'll give you them both:

Things to do before I die

1. Buy O'Malley the Superman and Batman Vs Aliens and Predator comic book. Because who doesn't want to buy their brother something that sounds that ridiculously epic?
2. Fall in love
3. Kiss in the rain (romantic much?)
4. Learn Japanese. I love Japanese culture and would love to go to Japan and I would like to be able to read manga in its original form and watch anime without dumb dubbing or subtitles.
5. Hang out in Cargo for a day. Cargo is a small town (about 100 people) in the absolute middle of nowhere but has about a bajillion sign posts directing you to it when I drive from my place to my Grandma's. They say all roads lead to Rome, but they're wrong. All roads lead to Cargo.
6. Bungy jump off a bridge
7. Go to Vietnam, Europe, Britain, The US, Japan and Central America
8. Take mum to France and cruising the Greek Isles. When mum backpacked around Europe she boycotted France because of the Rainbow Warrior and always regretted missing it so one day I'd like to take her there, and the Greek Isles has always been a dream of hers.
9. Hang glide
10. Scuba dive
11. Go to the Triple J café. This is a small cafe that has existed as long as I can remember on the road to visit my Grandma and I have never once stopped at it but have always wanted too. One of the draws is also that it's called the Triple J cafe and that's my favourite radio station.
12. Drive a tractor along Edwardstown road. Look, basically, this road is the most perfect road for tractor driving. It's a thin farmers track that weaves through paddocks and is just asking me to drive a tractor along it. How can I refuse?
13. Attend the major NaNoWriMo write in. Every November during National Novel Writers Month there is a major write-in, a gathering of participants writing together, which people from all over the world attend. I must attend one of these.
14. Go to the Freo markets.
15. Eat seafood on the Freo wharf. I used to live in Perth and some of my fondest memories are from Fremantle. I just want to do those things again before I die.

I've Just Been Told I Have Weeks to Live

If, under the circumstance that I come down with some incurable disease and find out I only have a short time to live, my bucket list is simply the lyrics to I am Dying Tomorrow by the Alkaline Trio, which I know is sort of cheating, but they sum up everything for me.

I'm Dying Tomorrow

I'm dying tomorrow
This house, this street, Chicago
I'm dying tomorrow
Did I do it right?
Did I remember to sleep in?
Take lots of pills?
Commit irreversible sins?
Did I at least try to kiss the prettiest girl at the right time?
Did I remember to keep your beer as full as mine?
Did I remember to say cheers?
Did I at least try to make sure everybody had a good time?
Had the best time?
Did I remember to stay up late?
Drinking for the fun?
Singing for the taste?
Did I run outside to kiss the rain
Under electrical skies?
I'm dying tomorrow
This house, this street, Chicago
I'm dying tomorrow

Did I do it right?

Bland About Me

110 post. Well I guess it's about time I told you something about me. So here's some boring, typical facts you write in the "about me" on websites. The questions were basically stolen off of Kevin.

Name:
Penguins Quack (and as Laura guessed, my middle name is Totallydo)

Age:
18.

Favorite colour:
ULTRAMARINE!! (because if its name) or red and black.

Favorite food:
Chocolate...

Favorite book:
Tales From Outer Suburbia by Shaun Tan. Sort of a young adult picture book or a collection of short stories. He's an amazing artist and an amazing writer.

Favorite movie:
Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe, The Great Escape, Life is Beautiful, Amelie and probably heaps more.

Favorite TV show:
Spicks and Specks. Oh, and of course, Mild Acquaintances. The fictional TV show, starring me and my friends, sorry, acquaintances

Favorite band:
Rise Against! (I think I've made that quite clear before).

Favorite song:
Jesus of Suburbia by Greenday.

Favorite scent:
The dusty smell of rain when it hasn't rained in months and the smell of wet concrete.

Favorite Disney Movie:
All the classics and Renaissance films. Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast, Mulan and Up.

Favorite quote:
Most Douglas Adams. Particularly "It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes". And also "What really knocks me out is a book, when you're all done reading it, you wished the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it" from the Catcher in the Rye.

Favorite season:
Autumn

Drink or smoke:
Nah. I'm legal for both but I'd prefer the straight edge lifestyle. I love when people apply the peer pressure and my friend comes into defend my by saying "Straight Edge is a hardcore punk lifestyle. It's totally cool that she doesn't drink."

Sing in the shower:
Most definately. I have portably iPod speakers so I can sing along while in the shower.

Most played song on iPod:
Anywhere but Here by Rise Against. (Ooh, Rise Against, there's a suprise).

Team Edward or Team Jacob:

Team Charlie! He's HOT!

That's my about me in a nutshell. NowI have to go wash up the dishes.

Later!

My Place

I got a lot of feedback about my Periodic Table T-shirt so I thought I'd show it to you all. And once I'd gotten out the camera I couldn't help but take a few photos.

Here's my T-shirt. It's a great conversation starter. I was bushwalking to Wineglass Bay in Tasmania and had two guys comment on it. One guy had walked past me when he suddenly spun around, pointed accusingly at me, and screamed "Periodic Table" at the top of is lungs. The other guy sort of just nodded and said "cool periodic table".

I want the periodic table shower curtain from the Big Bang theory.

This is my pin board. It's turned into more of a work of art than a notice board.

You might be able to notice my elevator safety guide in the bottom right-hand corner. This was a Christmas present from my brother, O'Malley. I gave him several bags of air. Just in case, you know? There's also my name spelt out using element symbols, two Andy Warhol quote postcards. Several song quotes. Several post-it notes designed by my friends, including one quoting the Raven. There's a playing card from Port Arthur in Tassie, a couple of sketches by me that I love, a batman birthday invitation and more!

These are a couple of the posters on my wall. I also have all the One Piece wanted posters, a WW1 recruitment poster (which I adore), and a Pink Floyd "The Wall" poster.

I chose to show these ones to you because of my original series Pokemon poster which came free with the 2BA Master Pokemon soundtrack CD my brother got when he was four and I recently stole to load onto my iPod. My brothers and I also went lapping to this CD. Blasting out the PokeRAP while "hoon-ing" around town is pretty epic.

Also pictured is my "Save the Planet" propaganda postcards and my Alkaline Trio poster. Those guys rock.

Here's my bookcase! The most important part of ones house. There are at least three other bookcases in my house, all more full than this one.

Notice my gorgeous four books on the second bottom shelf that I won as second prize in a Forgotten Bookmarks give-away? I've got War and Peace, Les Miserables, the Works of Shakespeare and the works of Carlyle. Try not to notice that I own all the Twilight books.

If I had to pick some of my favourites off this shelf I'd have to go with the Kate DiCamello (my mum and I are in love with this children's author), the Inkheart trilogy (the movie was the worst film adaption I have ever seen), Catcher in the Rye (because I'm married to Holden Caulfield. Do not debate this fact), my Markus Zuzak (the Messenger and the Book Thief), and probably my graphic novels. Don't judge me, people. V for Vendetta is an amazing movie and an even more amazing graphic novel.

This is my desk where I write this blog. It's from the old Catholic school. It has 3A printed on the side showing which classroom it used to be in. Funnily enough, my brother has the teachers desk from the old Catholic school.

See my sexy red computer? It's RED! There's also my iPod touch there and a load of other crap. The piece of paper pinned to my wall is the Rules and Advice for NaNoWriMo which I am now using for Script Frenzy. Would you like to take a closer look at what's written on my white board? Of course you would:

This was mum's motto for me while studying for the High School Certificate last year. I haven't rubbed it off yet because I'm planning to attack O'Malley with it when his exams come around.

I admit that I was the one that added the INGSOC slogan. Mum wasn't happy with the whole Ignorance is Strength line, seeming she was forcing me to study to make me less ignorant, so changed it to Undying Obedience.

Finally I'm adding an artwork that I did because I want to ask you your opinion. I still need to get a piece of coloured card for the background and I need to paint the frame but I'm having trouble choosing colours. If anyone tells me the guy has fat arms or looks like Ben 1o I will cyber punch you.

So they're just a little pieces of me. What do you think?

A Day in the Life of Penguins Quack

Both my beloved Zella (Grammatically Motivated) and Scott (Ergo) have written "A Day in the Life of..." articles on their blogs and I have been inspired to write one of my own.

May day's are pretty irregular. Because I broke my leg I've had to postpone Uni and I can't work so most days are spent bludging around the house. Except on Wednesdays and Thursdays I go with my mum to the school she teachers at as a volunteer. So here's a typical Wednesday/Thursday in the life of Penguins Quack.

6:45 - my alarm doesn't go off. I forgot to set it again. Instead I'm woken by mum's alarm going off in her room. Screw it. I'm not getting up.

6:50 - I realise mum will kill me if I don't get up but still can't be motivated to get out of my warm, comfy bed. I turn on my CD player. My theory says the Alkaline Trio will help me get up. For some reason Birds of Tokyo starts to play and I doze off again.

7:10 - Mum charges into my room telling me to get up. I tell her I already am, I just finished rubbing bio-oil on my scars. She leaves and I start rubbing bio-oil on my scars before putting on some jeans and my periodic table T-shirt.

7:15 - I stare into the fridge, then the pantry, then the freezer. I complain that there's nothing to eat for breakfast. I don't eat cereal and we're out of raisin toast. And bread. And milk. In the end I settle for mum's crumpets.

7:45 - Mum comes into the kitchen while I'm still eating and asks if I'm ready to leave. I'm not. I spent half an hour chatting to my brother, O'Malley, instead of getting ready. I run to the bathroom and brush my teeth while also brushing my hair and putting shoes on.

7:50: Mum makes me drive the 20 minute drive out to the small Aboriginal school she works at.

8:10 - We finally arrive. 10 minutes late. We go to the library where mum, the teacher-librarian, turn on the computer and sets up the borrowing system while I read picture books.

8:45 - School starts. All 23 students line up for morning notices and nose-blowing. For some reason we have to teach the kids how to blow their noses, and for some reason I have to participate. The kids then do two laps of the oval. Luke once again manages to get away with only doing half a one.

9:00 - Literacy. I take the slow learners out of the class. We do Look Say Cover Write Check with their spelling, I give them a test and then we do readers. The most boring stories ever written that i must read through about 4 times each day.

11:30-ish (I don't really know the school bell times) - Recess! Ramsey's about ready to thrash me with his reader and Maylan is asleep. The bell rings and the three of us enthusiastically run outside. I eat while chatting to the teachers. Someone asks Mr Nayler to peel their orange.

11:45-ish - Numeracy. I play snakes and ladders with the slow learners. The aim is number identification and counting forwards and backwards from a number. I lose the game, having gotten no closer to 100 that 20 the entire game.

1:15-ish - Lunchtime! At last! Escape! I flee from my horror, pledging never to play snakes and ladders again. Someone asks Mr Nayler to open their can of tuna.

1:45-ish - I have a choice. Take the infants for library with mum, or take the primary class for information tech. with Mr M. (the kids can't pronounce Reece's last name. I can't spell it). I take information tech. because Maylan wants me too. They're writing picture books for the infants class. Maylan and I spend all lesson trying to draw an alien on the un-oriented smart board.

2:30 - Mum returns and we do HSIE (human society in its environment). She's teaching "communities" so everyone has to draw a building in their community. At Natalie and Brianna's request I participate. I draw the doctors surgery. Then Brianna makes me draw a dolphin.

3:00 - Finally school ends and we head straight out to mum's friends place. He has a spa/hot-tub which I use for physio. Even when using it for physio, a spa is super-duper awesome.

4:45 - On the way home mum and I buy something for dinner because there's never any food in the house. When I say buy something for dinner, I mean a BBQ chicken.

5:00 - Finally home and I go straight to the computer. Facebook, Blogger, Twitter, Sparklife, Manga. On good Thursday afternoon's all the Shounen Jump manga's could be out. Otherwise I spend all evening refreshing the One Manga home page.

6:30 - We eat the BBQ chicken. Mum asks O'Malley how his day was and he gives an average answer. Mum and I then go and eat our dinner in front of the TV. O'Malley somehow manages to eat while playing TFC online.

7:00 - O'Malley and I wash up while mum goes for a walk. I then check Facebook and One Manga.

7:30 - after reading all my Shounen Jump I skype my twin brother, the Chairman, who is at a college in Canberra and whine about the latest Bleach to him. We then analyse everything that happened in Naruto to the point that an English teach would be shocked. We have nothing but praise for One Piece. I then complain that Skip Beat hasn't come out for three weeks and the Chairman hangs up on me.

8:30 - On Wednesdays I watch Spicks and Specks religiously, followed by Hungry Beast. On Thursdays I procrastinate until How I Met Your Mother at 9:00.

9:30 - I hope into bed and read and listen to music, at some point remembering to apply my bio-oil. I forget to set my alarm.

10:30 - Lights out. Music off.

11:40 - lights back on. Inspiration for something to write.

12:00 - back to sleep.

What do your day's involve?

Harmony Day

Harmony day was last week which is about dealing with culture, race and religious tolerance. So for Harmony day the Aboriginal school I volunteer at went on an excursion to another small school a long with the school for students with disabilities.

Unfortunately, even during Harmony day, people can be racist. I have never thought less of people of different race or considered them differently, and I am fascinated by different cultures so it shocks me when even young children make racist comments. I guess they must have been brought up with different attitudes than I was, but even so, I don't really understand why this thing goes on.

No that the disrest was one-sided. Kajika did get punched for making a comment that he was not willing to repeat.

Despite this, the day was great fun. Our school put on a performance of Aboriginal dances, there was a dance and a sausage sizzle. Highlights of the day for me included:

• Dressing up with the kids for their performance.
• Tangoing with Casey, the too-cool-for-school student
• Freaking Luke out by trying to get him to dance with me.
• Dancing while on crutches.
• Telling Jahnali she could only eat the watermelon she had been told not to eat if no one saw her take it (there's no way I can be a teacher. I'm too mischievous when around little kids).
• Ramsey, one of the kids who is always getting into trouble, saying "yeah I'm black, and I'm proud of it" to a kid after a racist comment.
• Arguing with Casey over horror movie cliches
• The look on Uriah's face after my mum (who is a teacher at the school) said that the 11-year-old she was dancing with from the other school was her boyfriend
• Hannah.

The major downside, besides Kajika (isn't that an awesome name) getting punched, was discovering that orange face paint does not come off easily.

100 and a Disco

Yay! My 100th post!

Time for a little 100th post party. Help yourself to the cupcakes. Sorry about all the confetti, it got a little wild for a moment there.

Anyway, on to what I was actually going to talk about (there's fairy bread, too, by the way. Just over there, behind the party pies. Yep, that's right. All sorted?).

Don't you love dances? Or, as they're still known in our backwards town, discos?

(Me: Didn't discos go extincted after the 70's?
Town elder: What! We're out of the 70's! Quick notify Mr.
Sheridan!
Me: Wasn't he like a town founder or something? Either way, he's
dead.
Town elder: Oh my! The town can't cope with such dramatic
change!)

Well, we have Youth Week coming up in April; a nation wide celebration of the youth of the community (that's me, by the way.) And so, as per town tradition, there's going to be a disco!

Of course, the Youth Council, a committee without any power run by the youth of the community, are running Youth Week and trying to organise some other activities (Movie night, LAN Gaming comp. and laser tag!!), but they're just to radical for the Town Elders that run the local council. The disco on the other hand, is something we know.

Unfortunately, I missed the meeting when the disco theme was decided upon. So I'm afraid it's going to be a rather unfortunate disco. The disco theme:

Twilight and Avartar

So... Um...

Well I have a choice of covering myself in body glitter or painting myself blue. This is a hard decision.

So. I can either look like a smurf or Lady Gaga...

This will take some thought.

Screw it. I'm dressing up as Russel from Up.

My brother's old Scout uniform, a sash and a zillion badges. Easy. Of course, Batman, James Bond, Ghostbusters and Darleks may not exactly be Wilderness Explorer badges, but they'll do. As will badges saying Sarcasm Society: like we need your support, my imaginary friend could beat up your imaginary friend and this is not a badge.

So I guess that's the disco taken care of. Sort of... The rest of Youth Week seems like it's going to be gnarly, so bring on April!

And that's all folks. Feel free to take a slice of cake for the road. Don't forget your little goodybag.

P.s. While writing this a had to go answer the phone and on my way back I forgot one of my crutches. No an easy thing to do. Just thought I'd tell you that.

Aliases

Okay, so I just had a friend begin writing a blog and in his About Me information he has listed some of his various aliases. So after reading this I thought I'd share some of my various aliases with you guys.

Gaming Names:

I do a bit of LAN gaming with my brothers and their friends and every gamer knows that you need an epic gaming name. I have a few (they change with each game):

• Spawn Camper
• Sasuke's Lovechild
• The Abyssal One
• Harley Quinn

Superhero Names:

I admit, I'm a little superhero obsessed so I have a couple of superhero aliases:

• Grammar Girl
• Laurizzle
• The Cultural Vigilante

Nicknames:

I didn't realise I had any nicknames until I began thinking about it here:

• Lozzle
• Losenger
• The Crazy Scary Lady
• Scarecrow

Alter-Egos:

My brothers and I all have alter-egos we introduce ourselves as when we don't think we're ever going to see those people again.

• Hi, I'm Risa Hawkeye.

I also occasionally introduce myself as Harley Quinn.

Internet Names:

• Penguins_Quack

I've been Penguins_Quack for so long I can no longer remember what my LastFM username was.

So what are you also known as?

Stranded

Today, my computer has been confiscated so I write this from my iPod. My iPod would have been confiscated too except that I use it to time my physio exercises.
My mum decided to steal and hide my computer because she thinks I spend too much time reading manga and not enough time doing said physio exercises. I blame midday movies, not manga. (But how can she take it on a Thursday and a Friday? That's when the new Naruto, Bleach and One Piece come out! And Skip Beat is due out on the weekend!)
Oh well. I still have my iPod so I do have a way around it but I don't think I'll be getting on Sparklife *bursts out in tears*.
if mum was really into getting me off the Internet she should turn of the modem for the wifi. It's on the ground so I can't reach it without being totally stranded (I can't put any weight on my broken leg so standing back up is not an option. Although my friend has already suggested using a Jack to lift myself off the ground).
But that's where I'm at. I may not yet be stranded on the floor, under a table, trying to reach the modem, but I am stranded, housebound, without my computer. So no manga, no Sparklife and no writing that story I was working on.
I guess the only option is to do my physio and win mum's trust back.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

How to Conquer Boredom While in Hospital

I was recently hit by a truck and only just got out of hospital. Okay, I didn't quite get hit by a truck, but pretty much. I was cycling on the wrong side of the road and crashed into an oncoming truck, Totalled my bike and my knee so I had to spend 12 days in hospital and have two operations on my knee. While I was in hospital I wrote this article "How to conquer boredom while in Hospital" which I thought I might send in to Sparklife but am too lazy to edit. So instead I'm giving you the unedited version:

1. Avoid the truck and don't get into hospital in the first place. Best way to dodge hospital boredom? Don't end up in hospital. So listen to me here, children, and obey road rules. They are there for your safety. My mum is furious that I didn't obey to road rules and was seriously begging the police officer to fine me.
2. Use your call button to play songs for the nurses. I don't know about you but my call button made a perfect musical instrument. Start with something simple like Hot Cross Buns and once you've got the hang of it move on to something more difficult, like Zero to Hero from Disney's Hercules. Maybe get the person in the bed beside you to join in, you could have a full orchestra of beeps.
3. Visitors (AKA Whining). We all love visitors, right? And if they don't come willingly spend your whole time on the phone milking them for sympathy (by the way, although I'm home I'm still house-bound so I will be milking you for sympathy in the comments). Feel free to play the "I got hit by a truck" line. I'm also playing on the fact that I missed the concert of my favourite band that I have been waiting for for months. Rise Against, I vow I will make it to your next concert.
4. Memorise the lyrics to every song on your iPod. I'm currently working on Whole New World from Aladdin. If you do this you'll be able to beep out a whole range of songs and sing along to them. I would be awesome.
5. Time how long it takes for a nurse to respond to your call button. The longest I have recorded was well over an hour. The shortest, less than a second. You can guess which nurse I liked better.
6. When ever doing some type of exerting activity sing inspirational songs. Up on crutches for the first time? I was singing Mulan's I'll Make a Man Out of You. Actually, I think I was singing that song most of the time... All of the time... I like that song, okay?
7. Watch Disney movies and listen to their soundtracks. You might not know it about me, but I love my Disney movies and their songs. So if you can get your hands on a way to play them, watch Disney movies. my brothers bought Up for me and it was fantastic. I cried. Also, [spoiler alert] Ellie looks like my Aunt. I also played Disney soundtracks constantly on my iPod. Well, that and the Doctor Horrible soundtrack. But I don't need to tell you to play that. You should already be doing it. Right at this moment. While you read this. And... Ahem. Yes, well, Disney.

So that's how I beat hospital boredom. I hope you're lucky enough never to have to try them out. No getting hit by trucks!

NaNoWriMo

Well. I only have one exam left. Extension History. Its been tough. Expectially when the clock stopped during my Modern history exam. But so far I've made it through, and I don't really care what happens to me afterwards. As long as I'm surviving, I'm okay.

You may have noticed my banner to the left: "NaNoWriMo participant"

Well, this November (so right now) I'm participating in the National Novel Writers Month where I have to write a 50 000 word novel by the end of November. I'm not really able to start until after my exams end on the sixth but I'm still attempting it. It's good motivation to finish something I write for once.

I might post some of it here, or start another blog for it, where you can read it. I enjoy constructive criticism and all that nonsense.

...I just lost my tissue and I have hayfever...

Alright, that's better. I'm feeling really positive about NaNo so I'm hoping to convince some people to join, even if its a bit late. But there's always next year!

Anyway, that's the end of this. Let's Write!

Sob

I hate life, I hate death and everything in between just doesn't interest me.

- Chris Rapier

I'm not that depressing, am I?

What make it sadder, I know exactly what he means.

To float or breathe

"To live and not to breathe is to die in tragedy"

And that is why this life is wasted on them all.
I still fail to breathe in this life. Sometimes I think I'm happy just to drift like this. Floating on the wind like a cloud...
But sometimes I want more.
I don't know what I just want it.
Maybe just something to stifle this boredom.
Sometimes to float is enough... sometimes its necessary to breathe deeply.
I haven't managed to do both successfully yet, though.