Friday, February 13

The Meaning of Life

I don't know. Everything just seems so pointless; like there is no need for anything. I know that's not true - we need food, water and shelter but that's it. Nothing else is exactly necessary,
But then life would be boring.
Why do people think there is a point to life? Why do we think there has to be a meaning?
Once upon a time the universe was created.
And that's it.
There is no meaning to it. It just happened. there is nothing more.
Not the romantic answer I would hope for.

Life blood

Dreams sustain me. Dreams are my life blood.

Why do I dream?
I dream because I long for excitement, for a change in everyday life. I dream because I need to. Because I need something.
I dream of anything. I long for everything.
When I say dream I mean, think, daydream, imagine...
I crave more to life and that is what I dream of...

I'm not sure what I crave. Just something different. But what?

...and how different does it have to be...?

Sunday, February 8

The Orange

The orange was, well, orange and round. It sat unmoving in the centre of the table and I watched it. The inanimate object sat and stayed inanimate and I was disappointed. This orange had such life blooming from its peel yet it could not show it. Could not move or jump about. The orange was frozen in it inanimate state. Inert. Like an un-reactive gas it did not react. Did not react to the exciting sounds or smells, did not smell the air or listen to the music. Or, if it did, it did not react. Un-reactive. Inert.
I could help myself no longer I extended a long, thin finger and prodded the orange gently. It rocked slowly, at once animate. But within seconds it had settled and was once again inert. I prodded the round object again, harder this time, and, this time it rolled. Racing across the table, the only athlete in a great running, rolling, race.
The orange rolled, and rolled until it fell from the table where it bounced. Once. Twice. Before landing motionless on the ground and lying there still. It did not pick itself up, dust of its metaphorical, orange knees. It lay still, as if its pride had been hurt by the fall and it would once again have nothing to do with motion.
Finally, after having watched the spherical orange object for far to long, I pick it up from its landing spot on my kitchen floor and peeled its tough skin from its pulpy flesh. Biting into the object provoked no thoughts of guilt. It was only an inanimate object after all.

Thursday, January 29

Warbrain

“Thoughts are the shadows of feelings, always darker, emptier, and simpler. I don't care if they're fake or real, I just thank them for showing up at all. I have black periods. Who does not? But they are not a part of me; they are not a part of illness, but a part of my being. What am I saying? I have the courage to have them. Four o' clock in the morning. This sucks.”


Warbrain
Alkaline Trio

Tuesday, January 27

Sheep to Murlocks

We are such sheep.
We follow the path presented and we are herded like sheep. Herded along, lifelessly in the first place, to our death, waiting for some Murlock-like creature to snuff the almost non-existent life out of our drone-like bodies.
I was driving along the M-5 today & these did not seem to be cars filled with individuals, no, these were carts on a production line creating an obedient droid army and food for the Murlocks.
I don't think we are as individual as we like to believe.

Wednesday, January 21

Room 804

8 stories up.
4 in the morning.
I sit on the window sill and watch as city lights dance for me.
People hurrying.
People stumbling.
Sirens.
Street cleaners.
Delivery trucks.
Cars lined up at red lights.
The city doesn't sleep, it dances for those who wait - who wake - to see...

Tuesday, January 13

My most perfect memory

My most perfect memory is playing T-ball on the front lawn in the evening in Attadale.
With mum batting and dad fielding.
My most perfect memory.

Crazy

Do you ever think that if you were crazy things would make much more sense?

Zero motivation: Cloud envy

It's unfair.
Why can't I be a cloud
And drift on the wind
And never try?
This statement is false.

Figure that one out!